The secret

This secret she's been keep for all this while. This secret haven't be told to anyone else. This secret is the key to her life. To her secret life.

Society
She can never pleased society. She don't know how to. Everything goes smoothly in the beginning of her life. But everything changed when she's grown up. Society seems to hate her badly. Society seems like can't accept her the way she is. She tried to go with what society wants. But even that, society never give her a chance.

Friends
There's no real meaning of friend in her entire life. She's been tricked, taking for granted by her trustworthee. She's always be there for them when needed, but if it comes to her, they gives her a thousand excuses to avoid it. She help her friends to settle down their problems, but hers, none of them settle. Her trust to anyone seems very easy to break by them. They lied her, they backstabbed her, they accuse her everything. They blame her on the mistakes.

Fakes
She fakes everything in her daily life. The smile. The laughs. The acts. The words. She can't show them her weaknesses. She smiles when their words hurt her. She laughs when she's about to cry. She says everything were fine when its not. She have to lie them. She have to. She can't tell them the truth. She don't want to break their heart while everyone do the opposite to her.

Scars
Not from the outside, but from the inside. There is many scars that can't be describe even by herself. Mostly from the one she loved and the one who used to love her. For them scars is just a scars. Once the wound becomes a scar, there is no pain felt. But they was wrong. Totally wrong. The wound might be healed but the scars are there. Along with its pain. It is there. That one big scars that hard to explain and to understand by anyone or herself.

Hopes and Dreams
She lose all her hope since she lose her trust. She's too tired to take all that. She need some rest. She need some her-time-moment. She nees to go out from all this. Her actual hopes and dreams is to live with her loves one happily ever after. But the truth is happily do exist, not the ever after.

Away
She's done with everything. She's tired of all dramas. She's bored of the society. She gives up. White flag is in with her. She has no more strength to take it any longer. To be far way from them is the main thing she want if she could. Sometimes, she hopes something hit her and she lose her memory. She want to start everything back. She want everything go with her flow. She wants to repair her mistakes. She wants everything going right. She really can't stand it. How longer she can be like this ? How longer must she hold ?